The Malawi government cash cow, the Malawi Communication Regulations Authority (Macra) is a Father Christmas on ‘call’ because it bails governments’ broke and ailing ministries on the blink of an eye.

Maria Banda has just resigned as a housemaid in Balaka District; she now plies her trade as a prostitute in Mangochi and earns a much better income.

Malawi Police officers in eastern region are patting themselves on the back after a succesful anti-HIV and AIDS which has seen the drastic fall of the disease prevalence.

President Peter Mutharika says Malawi must fight back against the fraudulent movement of foreign exchange offshore, which is aggravating poverty.

Both academic and support staff at Mzuzu University(Mzuni) have fingered the institution’s seven-member management for.

Sabre rattling, Malawi’s Ombudsperson, Martha Chimuza-Mwagonde has ordered the arrest of hordes of top civil.

An explanation has been demanded for a $235,700 payment from a firm that landed major oil and gas exploration concessions on Lake Malawi.

Malawi’s ombud, Martha Chimuza-Mwagonde, says she has received death threats because she is investigating graft in the government’s Green Belt Initiative, set up to buffer millions of peasant farmers from drought.

The scandal surrounding Malawi’s politically connected Sterling Timber International has deepened, with an insider alleging that the government settled the company’s large debt to the state-owned Malawi Savings Bank.

The country knows it needs to diversify its agriculture, but the vested interests of multinational giants is hampering its efforts.

For 33 years now, Reverend Levi Nyondo, as God’s anointed ‘shepherd,’ has watched HIV/AIDS decimate his ‘sheep.’ Although his homilies have urged sexual abstinence and fidelity, which should slow spread of the disease, he grudgingly admits that the heavy loss of his parishioners to the pandemic is a clear sign that these messages are falling on deaf ears.

Eighteen months after Cashgate hit the headlines in Malawi, only five of the 68 people arrested in connection with the scandal have been tried and convicted. About R2.1-million – less than one percent of the estimated loss to government – has been recovered.